Some Fears Around Sabbatical…

After almost two decades of teaching at Southern Maine Community College I finally decide to take advantage of their sabbatical program and apply for it…. not thinking I would actually get it… yet I did! Once again… be careful what you ask for in life… you may just get it.

Ok… now that it’s been a month after ALL final papers are approved and now I feel free and clear to purchase a thousand dollar airline ticket and arrange all that I need to plan my time away.

Sure, one of my sabbatical intentions is to be learning about international cooking, and the study and practice of spiritual truths right in the heart of Hindi and Buddhist land. Vipassana and mystical study will ensue. I plan on initially traveling to Varanasi, India where it is said is the spiritual capital of the world.

Only to find out that Varanasi is also home to Shiva and the Lord Shiva Temple. As well as the home of Annapurna Temple, the goddess of Food. Annapurna means… who gives complete food. As the name indicates the Annapurna temple is dedicated to the Goddess of Food. Food is a part of human survival and so the creation of a Goddess to worship is human attempt to be free from the fear of food scarcity. Annapurna Temple is said to keep Varanasi City free of Food Crisis.

OK then…. so what am I afraid of? Here’s the top 2 for now. I’m sure there will be more as time goes along…

  • I spent the latter half of my life cultivating community and getting free from loneliness and isolation. There is a community I have at home that loves me, cares for me and looks out for me. Now I’m going by myself to a country where there is great poverty and I don’t speak the language. I fear the potential loneliness that will come with this trip.
  • There are many children that are orphaned and there is very little money to help care for them. My heart isn’t sure how it’s going to be able to handle all of that. Especially when there are movies and documentaries out there that picture Hindi children getting maimed in order to pull at the heart strings of westerners with tender hearts such as myself.

As one of my teachers used to say…